I actually finished my manuscript “Where’s My F***ing Cake, Bob?” How I Survived My True Love’s Trips to Rehab a year ago, but the manuscript and I have been having a staring contest. The book won.

What started off as a “romp thru addiction” memoir, will now be more of a how-to book. How to stay sane whether someone you love is using or not. How to find serenity when you lose yourself to caregiving. How to take care of yourself–rather than drowning in the exhaustion and heartbreak of trying to fix another person. And finally how to detach with sharp scissors, paints, watercolors. knitting needles, nature, fish hooks, books, Netflix binges, peanut M&Ms and, yes, love. As an artist and writer, I naturally have lots of creative ideas about creative family recovery.

You’ll still get the low-down on our family story, but now the main focus will be helping folks find ways to use the tears, anger, laughter, and gallows snarkiness to bounce back and find joy. Recovery is a family affair. 

I have the utmost respect for those with substance abuse disorders, but they tend to get all the headlines. The home team needs every bit as much TLC and attention as the lucky-loos in rehab. In fact, I fantasize about a world where everyone in the family heads off to month-long rehab get-aways like “weird twin camps across the lake from each other.”

In a genre filled with stories of unbearable losses and anguish, I hope to bring a witty, hopeful rallying cry to share with friends and family members. We want the recovery community and our loved ones to remember: “We’re Here! In Tears! Get Used To It!”